So, I’m here. Who saw it coming? But um did anyone see Muslim girl moving out? Not married? Well your darn right I did that. Why? Well… I needed space. And now that I have space I want to go home again. Until I’ve gone home and remember why I left.
Let me explain. I love my family so much but there’s a lot of us and having to take in the energy from everyone and everything was really getting to me. I wanted a fresh start so I made a financially big decision. Option 2 was get a bouncy castle and live there and I’m still confused why I didn’t choose that one.
At the time I was all like whatever I can live alone I can do this. And don’t get me wrong I may have burnt some food, overwatered my meals (check the video) and my room may still be messy (if this is my mum reading this then no my room is never messy). But homesickness hit me so hard in a way I couldn’t imagine.
Like I mentioned I have a pretty big family (6 not including me) and they’re all pretty loud and extroverted whilst I’m introverted and although I can be sociable I need twice as much down time to work with it. So leaving sounded like a haven. My own space. Until. Until I actually missed my annoying siblings. Until I missed my Dad’s constant lectures. Until I couldn’t even have my mum judge everything I buy when I walk through the door with shopping bags. And now I’m in a room with a tub of PB at my bedside and cranberry juice in my cup. And all by myself. I miss my family.
So I made a YouTube channel. Did I tell them about it? No. But it is kind of for them. I want to share my life with them and have a connection. But also who am I kidding, didn’t everyone want to make a YouTube account after Bethany Mota? Not going to lie I’m not the best. I know my audio is absolute trash. Yes, I am using iMovie to edit. I am that basic (minus the MacBook (for now)) so expect so,e cringe worthy videos. But expect videos because I am so hyped about them.
I’m not going to force anyone to watch. That might not be your thing and that’s totally cool. But be ready to have every video shared on this page. Recording videos does not make me love writing out my life any less. Wow has anyone watched ‘You’ on Netflix? “Oh she was asking to be seen” like shut up I’m sharing all this with you be grateful you do not need to go above and beyond as a stalker NO body asked for that. Anyways, that show annoyed me (I watched it in two nights).
I was supposed to be ending this post.
Oh right, my videos yeah so I make videos. I am a young trainee video creator so watch out world. More creative Shazeda. Anyways here’s my first video. Maybe I sound like I’m blurting everything so maybe watch the video for more insight? Maybe.
Love you. Shazeda.
Also, my first YouTube video, don’t let me know what you think haha I’m nervous.